Greatness Unfolding

Every time I allow my mind to revisit the state it was in when I was at Oxford, I discover new ways in which I have truly transformed into a better version of myself. There are some feelings and moments I had that I can't quite put into words yet, but some of the other crucial elements of my Oxford journey seem to slip off the tongue with such great ease. One of the main reasons why I studied abroad is to share these moments with others; I am more than happy to keep that promise.

While at Oxford, my mind was focused on more than just the academics there. For half of my time abroad, I studied for the LSAT, took the test twice, and formulated personal law school application materials that would perfectly capture the essence of Timaira. I must be honest and admit that this nearly drained me. I hadn't ever been through such a drawn out period of writer's block, and it was really taking a toll on me. I am an artist; creative writing is a tool that I use to express myself in ways I couldn't otherwise. My confidence definitely shrunk (temporarily) because I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that I was struggling with something that had always been so easy for me.

Also during the month of October (since that was when things really kicked off and I was losing my mind), I registered for my final semester of classes. I am a graduating senior, so this registration period was definitely the most crucial one. Usually, the process is easy. The week before registration, I choose the classes I'll take, and then when the day comes, I input the numbers to lock in the classes. Worst case scenario, there's one class that I have to replace with another in the same department. This time though, I started finding out about things last minute, and (for whatever odd reason) so many of the classes I needed were scheduled in the same bubble of time. I spent three whole days staring at my computer, trying to crack the code. It's like I just couldn't get it... until I finally did. Thank God!

In the same month, I celebrated my late father's birthday. This is the second time around--he passed away late last year--so it wasn't as painful, but it's still a very emotionally heavy event. I tend to push my personal time with my dad and God to the middle of my mind when I am overwhelmed with other stuff, but I am learning to prioritize them because that time is the only thing that's pushing me through sometimes. I'll never give up on life, but I do have to remain 100% committed to The One who has blessed me with this life. I can never put Him after the things He's blessed me with.

I've always been used to (and loved) my own company, so I didn't necessarily feel lonely at Oxford. I cherished every single moment I had, and I am beyond grateful for the opportunity to relay so many messages to different communities/the youth. I've never been through such a demanding, stimulating, challenging time in life. I almost want to say that Oxford has taken so much out of me. But in reality, it poured into me. When you are being prepared and instilled with everything you need in order to properly receive the massive blessing coming your way, it will likely be one of the hardest situations in your life. You may have your moments when doubt strikes and fear tries to drown you, but make sure you never close your mind and your heart. Even when your vision is a little shaky, always remember that you walk by faith and not by sight. You may never know what your future holds or how you're going to get there (it's really none of your business, it's God's), but what's certain is that you are never alone. God is already in every room I am walking into, and I am ready to take the next step.