Preparing to Soar

“I’m free as a bird, lost in the stars and waving down to earth. Don’t know where I’m gonna land, but you gotta wobble before you stand…” — Sydney Forest, “Soaring”

Flurries of words are swirling in my head — reminders, plans, anxieties, dreams, hopes. Need to pack. Hang out with friends. Do laundry. Take pictures. Remember to do homework for online class (that’s one I need to keep remembering). Pick up medicine. Buy extra deodorant in case of possible odor emergencies. Print airline tickets. Locate passport. Pack passport. Double-check that the passport is packed. Did I remember to pack my passport?

In a few days, I will be arriving at the Schiphol airport in the capital of the Netherlands — Amsterdam. This winter has been filled with preparation and speculation. A lot of firsts are coming with living in a new country. Firsts are scary, but also thrilling. Without firsts, how can we move on and grow?

Over this winter, I had my first tattoo. Getting inked is like any new experience: it might hurt at the beginning, but soon the pain dulls. Over time, you see that the pain led to something beautiful, and now that something is a part of you forever, that you cherish and can’t live without.

My tattoo is of Kiki from Studio Ghibli’s Kiki’s Delivery Service. As a young thirteen-year-old witch, she needs to leave home and train for a year to become a strong, independent young woman. Not only is the film one of my all time favorites (with the worn-out VHS tape to prove it), but I’ve always identified with Kiki. Now, I will be traveling like her. And like Kiki, I hope to grow and become stronger and more independent.

I’ll stumble along, sure. I need to learn a new language, re-learn how to ride a bike, and get lost a few times. Or maybe more than a few times; I’m not very good with directions sometimes. But first, I need to sit on my suitcase to get the zipper pulled all the way around and soar through the air on a few hundred ton plane.