Coming Home (WARNING-EMOTIONAL)

I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to my cab driver, John, who loaded me up into the taxi last Saturday while I was fully sobbing, heaving, and wiping snot on my shirtsleeves. I know that you know, John, that we were heading to the airport, and that I would have to travel almost 24 hours back to the United States in that very shirt, all slathered in snot. I appreciate that you told me “it’s fine, it’s alright, all good then” about 25 times as you floored the gas and blared 90’s hip hop in an effort to get me to my terminal as expediently and unemotionally as possible. 

John, I had one of the best summers of life in Dublin. I’m 23 and when it came time to leave, I wanted to throw a tantrum like a toddler. You had the deep misfortune of meeting me as I was saying goodbye to some incredible friends and thus ending six weeks of joyful Irish chaos. 

Coming home hasn’t been nearly as devestating as I thought it might be as I was doubled over in the backseat of John's taxi. Life continues to provide distractions and to-dos that absorb you completely. But, Dublin does suddenly feel very far away. It’s no less precious, but there is a kind of odd transition as the experience moves from the present to memory. It’s impact will reveal itself over the next couple weeks as I transition back to ‘real life’. I am definitely feeling zesty and refreshed, not just reflective and melancholy. Ireland was just, absolutely, exactly, unequivocally what I needed. 

Studying abroad gave me a radically new perspective on my own growth and healing. In such a concentrated and intense environment, there were many things that bubbled to the surface that had remained latent in my life at home. Various insecurities and anxieties reared their heads, but I’ve ultimately walked away with a lot of confidence and trust in myself. It was very illuminating and also a little exhausting. There was a lot of joy and a lot tears, and all of it was valuable.

This will be my last report from my summer in Dublin! I can’t say it enough, but I am so grateful to the professors and friends that made Ireland such a exceptional experience. I’d also like to say a heartfelt thanks to anyone that even skimmed these blogs, it’s been a magnificent way to try capture drops of the experience that has been slipping through my hands.

To anyone considering Dublin, or simply study abroad: GO! You could fall in love, eat rashers and beans, walk ten miles a day around a city so it begins to feel like home, swim in the glorious and healing salt water of the ocean, cry on the Luas, literally frolic in green fields of bleating sheep, and feel a blossoming within yourself of something new and very important that can only be found way out there in the wide world.

Until next time! Off YOU go!